*sigh* Well, here I sit at 10:30 and tired but with no ability to lay down and go to sleep. Insomnia sucks. Depression sucks. I have contacted the doctor and will be increasing my Paxil dosage to 40 mg, that's twice what I've been taking. I feel better than I did, but more and more stretched tight and snap-worthy. If you have ever suffered clinical depression, you know that feeling that I'm talking about.
My headaches and finger and hand pain is really bothering me, I am taking pain killers constantly now. Over-the-counter stuff, of course. I have an appointment with a rheumatologist for a fibromyalgia consult in February. That seems like such a long time to wait. Meanwhile, I hurt everyday. My head, my hands, my fingers, my knees, my feet, my back, my hips. I am 31 but feel 65 or more already. I guess it's not surprising considering the trauma my body went through at such a young age.
On positive notes, we attended parent-teacher conferences for Christopher and Kirsty. Christopher is doing fairly well, a bit of a talking problem, doesn't focus well and we need to work on his writing, but all in all, seems to be doing quite well. Kirsty is also doing well, only 2 points from straight-As. She got a B in art, missing the A by two points. That sucks for her!! She is however grounded because she met up with a 16-year-old boy at 1AM at a friend's house when we let her spend the night!! NOT good!!
I think Johnathan has an inguinal hernia. I noticed it yesterday. We have an appointment on Tuesday to have it evaluated by his pediatrician. I just don't want my poor baby to have to go through surgery!!
Mom and Daddy are doing okay. After Daddy's DUI, their relationship is even more strained, which isn't a big surprise. Mom, bless her soul, has mental issues. She's depressed and it manifests just terribly. She's so buy taking care of everyone else she won't take care of herself. The anxiety and stress that you can see and hear just talking with her is phenomenal. I wish she'd take some Paxil or something. I hate seeing her so unhappy.
Justin is trying to start a business-painting white walls on the weekends. I don't know how that wuold go. I'd love to see him succeed. I may do his invoicing and billing, which may be a bit out of my league, but somebody's gotta do it. He'll have to get QuickBooks or something.
We are trying to buy a house--again. We have a loan, but only for 75%, so that means we need to find someone willing to carry teh down payment separately.
Well, I suppose that's about it for tonight.
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